Choose Happiness
In February of this year (2022) I had my life take a sharp left turn down a rocking uncharted path. It went to a place that I thought I would never be expected go and never desired to even visit. I could have easily spiraled down into a deep depression but I knew I wouldn't be any good to anyone if I let myself go there. Instead I decided to go deep inside of myself, after giving myself 15 minutes to freak out and cry out in frustration, and found happiness and peace in anything and everything I possibly could think of in order to survive this scary new path I was expected to travel on.
Where the journey began
After a bought with COVID-19 in December of 2021, my family began to heal and put our life back together. All of us, accept my eldest son, recovered from this nasty virus that knocked us down through the 2021 Christmas holiday. After seeing his primary care physician and having an x-ray and a CT scan, his doctor decided my son should go see a specialist in Boston, MA. As we were waiting for that appointment, he ended up in the emergency room coughing up blood in the early hours of a Tuesday morning. That horrible event put us right to the head of the line as well as an extended stay at Children's Hospital up in Boston. After five days of them performing every possible test, he received the diagnoses of Hodgkin Lymphoma.
In the blink of an eye, your whole world can change. You can be the Mom of two teen boys, planning vacations and graduations parties, to all of a sudden the Mom of a cancer patient. You will never be prepared for that kind of news. As hard as you try to plan for everything, this is one thing you will never be ready for. It will hit you like a brick wall and knock you clear on your back. It will rip at your very soul and take your breath away. In the silence of the night, when the house goes quiet, it will be your choice if you decide to find your strength and begin the fight of your life or you lay down and surrender. It will be your choice if you decide to find happiness and peace in the eye of the storm. It will be your choice if you decide to see your blessings and reach for something that you just never thought was possible. I would like to share my story with you so you can see what is possible with the human spirit and how to reach for something that most have no idea is possible. I hope my story can help you on your journey to happiness and peace.
I am blessed
I haven't always had the ability to see the beauty in something that others see as broken. It's taken me many years of practice and soul searching to get where I am today. I will never say it's has been easy to flip the script on my thinking. It's VERY hard to make the change from what you have always known to something that feels foreign and awkward. However, I will tell you, it's worth every moment you spend practicing this way of thinking.
I have spent almost my whole life worrying and thinking of the worst possible scenario for any situation. I thought I was doing myself a favor when I would think through all the possible outcomes. In the end, I was only setting myself up for failure. It was not until about a year ago I started to stop stressing and worry about things I had no control over. Even those things I had control over I made sure I thought positively about the situation. I began saying to myself "everything always goes my way". As I began making these simple changes, everything just worked out. As I put fear on the back burner and just listened to my intuition, magically good things began to happen and things always worked out, when all was said and done.
With this simple practice of finding the good in everything, I also began telling myself that I was blessed. When something would happen that had the potential to stress me out, I would stop and say "I am blessed". I would begin to list in my head all the things I am blessed for. These were simple things like "I am blessed for my two beautiful children"; "I am blessed for the roof over my head"; "I am blessed that my refrigerator is full of food". There were days that I would keep it super simple by saying"I am blessed I woke up this morning". This practice did two thing - 1. it stopped me from going down the negative path and 2. calmed me down from the thing stressing me out. But the number on thing it did was retrained my brain and rewired it for finding peace and joy in all things.
So the moments you feel unlimited, the moment you feel abundant, the moment you feel free from any experience, now you are teaching your body chemically to understand what your mind has intellectually understood.
Dr. Joe Dispenza - https://iamfearlesssoul.com/joe-dispenza-on-how-to-rewire-your-brain/
Listen to your gut instincts
It is so easy to let your fear and anxiety lead your thoughts. Its the easy path to just do nothing and hide under your covers. It's less stressful to just do nothing. I understand why most people give into their fears! I did it for most of my life. It was not until I had to change my way of thinking back in 2018 when I became very ill and was faced with the possibility of being blind in one eye. It's not until you are faced with something horrible, that you might find yourself in a fight or flight situation. Many people have no idea that they have a choice. You can choose to fight vs. lay down and let the doctors tell you that this is just how it's going to be. You have the power to heal yourself, take control of your own destiny and to be something more than you ever thought was possible. You...have ...the...choice!
The best thing you can do for yourself, besides feeling blessed, is to fine tune your intuition. If you listen closely to your gut, it will tell you everything you need to know. Your gut instinct is that split second advise that comes from inside you. It's the thing that tells you to turn left instead of right. It's that thing that makes the hair stand up on the back of your neck that so many ignore. It's that feeling that someone or some thing is just not right. Often it's the thing that people ignore when they should be doing exactly what it's telling them to do. Why do we not listen? Simply put, we are afraid. We let fear and the unwillingness to do the hard things in life get in the way of our own success. Do I always listen to my gut instinct? Heck NO! Do I do it more than in the past? Absolutely! and it's paid off time and time again. It's what healed me and gave me my eye sight back. It's what enabled me to find my job that I have today. It's what put me in my beautiful home that I live in. It's an amazing gift that everyone has the power to use.
The tools in my toolbox
So as I embark on this new path where I am a Mom of a cancer patient, I have started to use the tools in my toolbox that I have been practicing for a few years now. I absolutely have had moments where I have broken down. But as soon as I freak out I start reminding myself that I am blessed. Everything works out for me and my family! All shall be well. I know in the deepest part of my soul that my son will be healed. He is exactly where he needs to be with the best possible doctors in the world. He not only will be cured of cancer but he will grow and be a better person because of this experience. I will grow and will discover so many new things about myself because of this experience. Who knows! My son may decide he wants to be a doctor or a researcher because of his experience with cancer. I might find a new job working with people who need my help as they fight cancer or their loved ones fight cancer. I believe there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. We will survive this horrible event in our lives and come out the other side better for it. We are BLESSED! We are LOVED! We have HOPE! and ALL SHALL BE WELL!
I wish you all PEACE, LOVE and LIGHT.
Breaking The Habit of Being Yourself: How to Lose Your Mind and Create a New One
Comments